Tamara Unleashed

Everett came to visit Sunday after a day of kayaking. Everett LOVES tractors and was thrilled to b able to steer Katie and move the bucket up and down. Craig enjoyed having such a inquisitive boy around that already knew a lot about tractors.

We had a fun evening with Everett and his siblings Eli and Emma and parents Danny and Brent, The swing got a lot of use and Emma started making friends with the cows,

We can’t wait for the next visit.

Craig and I were out inspecting various buiding materials he has for building some steps down the slope to the shop. While inspecting these stone blocks left over from building a bridge (that Craig designed and build himself) we noticed number 14 approaching the fence.

I slowly walked up to the fence using my best cow friendly voice and she kept coming forward. Before long we were both at the fence. Shr put her head through and I scratched her nose. She withdrew her head and stayed at the fence. It was at this point that I handed Craig my phone for some pics.

I think we really had a moment there. I am curious to see if she approaches me again. If so I will name her, I was thinking Elsie but Craig does not thing that is original enough,

Our first day in DC was rainy and windy so we did not venture out. Our second day was sunny, cool and breezy. We walked 3/4 mile to the Metro Station in Cleveland Park and rode to Metro Center where we got off and walked along the east and south side of the White House to the Vietnam Memorial. I have been there several times before but never with someone who had been Infantry in Vietnam – “boots on the ground – in the line of fire”. We walked along the Memorial and then found the books that listed the location on the wall of every person killed in Vietnam.

Craig found the names of men in his company who were killed and we located each name on the wall.

Because the names are listed by the dates of death, the names were clustered on 3 panels. While Craig spent time reflecting, people were respectful and gave him space. A lovely docent approached to offer support. After listening to Craig’s recounting of what it was ike to be “out on in the bush” for 6 weeks at a time wearing the same uniform with all of the field gear they carried to try to stay alive, the statues of the infantry moved me. Craig inspected them carefully and found they were pretty accurate in each detail. Many of the “niceties” like air mattresses or heavy flak jackets available to infantry were simply not carried/used in most circumstances to keep packs as light as possible.

We recently watched the Ken Burns 10 part series on the Vietnam War and I now have a much better understanding of how the US got involved and the lies that kept us there for way too long. I graduated from high school the year the US pulled out of Vietnam so aside from being against the war (whatever that meant is small town Iowa) I was uninformed.

I took a photo of each of the names. Later after Craig had a chance to review them he did not like the way they looked with all of the reflections on the walls from the sun. So we went back on our last day in DC which was cloudy. While rain was predicted for the afternoon, it started several hours early and the new photos had a different type of reflection from the rain drops.

This was Craig’s second visit to the wall. The first time, he and his friends waiting until after midnight so he could play and sing a song about the way. We did not try to repeat that this time although I kind of wish we had. If it had been warmer we might have.

We were ready with our Hawkeye shirts, chips and guacamole to cheer the Hawkeyes on. They came out on fire and then lost the flame while SC got ignited. It was fun to watch the NCAA tournament. Clearly SC was the better team today and they showed why they are undefeated.

It appears that Craig got the best of the mice. No mice or licking of peanut butter for several days. He was confident enough to put the silverware drawer back in place. It is a lot of work to clean it out so we did not give them a chance to explore the drawer and leave deposits.

Tonight Craig went to check the gas grill and found the tank empty. Upon further investigation, he found the hose between the tank and the grill had been eaten through by one or more squirrels. Fortunately, Craig had an extra tank and two extra hoses. Problem solved in short order.

James played a show on Friday night that overlapped with the Iowa semifinal against UConn. He supported them from the stage. He played with a duo, Karli and James, who remind me bit of Natalie and the Drive. It is always fun to see them perform. We watched the second half from the bar he performed at. We were the only ones interested in the game.

I mowed the lawn for the first time yesterday after getting the big sticks and branches picked up. It felt really good to be outside and active. I also had my first personal training session in over 3 months. I could tell I had lost some ground but not a great deal.

James has started playing pickle ball and I went to check it out. It seems to be good exercise and a very social environment. A great way to meet people of all ages. I will get Craig and I some paddles and we can check it out.

A wild iris bloomed this week. The ongoing beauty of spring.

My goal for this week is to get out on the bike. I can tell my knee needs it. Wish me luck.

I have not had a chance to see the the Hawkeye women play that many times this season and until the NCAA started, they had lost the games I watched so I was feeling like a bad luck charm and decided it was better not to watch. It is not that easy to follow the team using streaming only. I pay for plenty of streaming services but none that include ESPN. Games broadcast on ABC are easy – otherwise we have watched “unauthorized” posts of the game on YouTube. You can see them on YouTube TV but not officially on YouTube. After 15-20 minutes, the center screen would get grayed out with a warning. Craig was very good at finding another YouTube link that would work for 15-20 minutes. We made it to the end of the game. Interestingly, we had no trouble watching the UConn vs USC game on YouTube so there must have been so much traffic for the Iowa vs LSU game that it drew attention.

We are having so much fun watching these game. My high school was a consolidated school district that did not have a women’s basketball team. At that time the smaller districts had girls team that play 3 on 3 half court which was an entirely different game. I distinctly remember commercials on TV in the 70’s against ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment stating that it would end Iowa women’s basketball. No one thought that women could play full-court basketball. For Iowans, who highly valued their women’s basketball, that was one of the more powerful commercials against ratification and Iowa did not ratify the ERA.

Within a decade high school girls were playing full court 5 on 5 basketball. Over the past 5 decades I have not really paid much attention to women’s basketball. I watched the championship game in Honolulu last year. A tough loss. From one game I was not able to really appreciate what was so great about Caitlin Clark. The Sweet Sixteen and Elite Eight games gave me the chance to fully appreciate what a skilled, passionate player she is – unapologetically competitive. Good for her and good for everyone on the Hawkeye team and all women in sports really.

As an aside, Craig and I often have conversations about how terminology has changed with respect to genders. Some women do not want to be called actresses preferring female actors. During one of the recent games, Craig turned down the sound to share with me that he was upset about the cultural misappropriation of women playing “man on man defense”. I burst out laughing.

No question it is confusing as to which words or phrases are commonly understood to be nongendered and those that are traps waiting for men to set off.

Craig caught one mouse this morning and found a couple of traps licked. Unclear if we have caught them all. To increase the odds of catching any future mice, Craig decided to do some research and found a way to modify the standard trap for a “hair trigger” response. Hopefully this will allow us to catch any remaining mice that are choosing to stay or come indoors in spite of the nice weather. Fingers crossed. Growing up in older homes, mice were not uncommon and aside from having one die in the wall, they didn’t really bother me that much. Any fear I had was from observing my mom’s fear. Craig does not like having them in the house and insists on managing their capture and the clean up of any mess they leave. I feel fortunate.

Last night we had the opportunity to see Natalie perform with her 2 best friends at the Tin Pan South Songwriters Festival. We drove through HEAVY rain to get there as Natalie does not perform in Nashville very often. I think the rain kept the room from being full. It was a pretty intimate setting with acoustic guitars so you could hear the their voices. They each took a turn singing a song they had wrote or had co-wrote and sometimes performed together on songs they had written together. They were all very accomplished songwriters and performers. The audience was very appreciative of their songs, voices and performance skills. This festival has 96 ninety minute performances in 10 venues over 5 days. This Festival seems like a better deal appreciating music than the CMA Fest in early June. Way less crowded, acoustic sets and not nearly as hot outdoors.

We will be seeking out and attending songwriter rounds on a regular basis. It’s time to really enjoy all that Nashville has to offer.

We returned from our trip to DC only to find the mouse or mice that we thought we had rid ourselves of were still here – “when the cats away” is totally true. They chewed parchment paper, hot mitts and left plenty of droppings.

Craig did a thorough cleaning of the “food areas” Sunday and reset all the traps. Yesterday, he had caught one mouse and found 2 others licked clean. We hoped we had our pest. This morning, there was an expletive from the kitchen and once again we had 2 traps with the peanut butter licked clean and one missing trap. A search for the missing trap ensued. It was found far. back in cupboard without a mouse.

Lower cupboards are now all thoroughly cleaned and traps are once again set.

I can’t wait to see what happens tomorrow morning,

The first daffodil buds appeared before my surgery on Feb 15th and it is nice that later blooms are still around. The grass started turning green over night and it is time to start mowing again. I still have 10 days to go before I am finished with my activity restrictions. I can’t wait to get tired from physical exertion. I had really counted on having more pain to help limit my activity but pain has been minimal from the beginning. Thus far I have had a good outcome from the surgery and am glad that I did it.

It was so exciting when he drove it off of the ramp onto the newly constructed dirt and gravel ramp. While only the driver’s side was damaged, he replaced everything but the wheel on the passenger side as well. The car had 190K miles on it and he had just replaced the brakes earlier last year so hopefully we will have time to put another 190K miles on it. It is a more comfortable ride than my CMax hybrid so we have options for our car trips.

I started constructing a barn door style sliding door for the master bedroom at the condo in December. Craig did the installation yesterday. I absolutely love the look. So much better than the big white door opening into the room and hiding a corner.

Friday night we went to see Pat McLaughlin play at a small restaurant venue about 40 minutes SW of Nashville. James and Natalie have been following him for a long time and I think I saw him live with James a LONG time ago. He generally plays with the same band members and does not allow the group to rehearse. He likes the loose feel of the set that is a fair amount of improvisation. Apparently this was only the second time this base player did a live show with him and you could tell it was a wild ride. It was such a FUN show.

Last week I got a travel/protective case for an electric bass guitar and Craig went and picked up the used base this morning. I will be starting lessons soon – once there is money invested, I will be obligated to do my part.

For my last week of activity restrictions we are going to take a car trip to Washington DC and NC. The Cherry Blossoms will be past peak but it still should be beautiful. Later this year they will be removing 300 of the cherry trees in the Tidal Basin to repair the sea wall.

When we return, we will start cycling and I will find a bass guitar instructor.

This post was written on November 5th 2023. I was waiting for a photo of Danny and Brent’s wedding to include and then forgot….

In the past 2 weeks, we were present for the unexpected death of Craig’s best friend, James Peters and joyful wedding of Danny and Brent. I had the incredible privilege of being Danny’s Best Person and walked him down the aisle at sunset last night. Such a joyful celebration. Danny’s 3 kids, Emma (13), Eli (12) and Everett Fox (7) each had a role in the ceremony. Eli and Fox got up to the microphone and made some special comments and Emma sang them a song. The pastor gave such a warm and personal message as a part of the ceremony that I was a bit overwhelmed. It truly was the perfect celebration of life and love.

Craig and his friend James have made music together for the past 30 years and have been there for the highs and lows in each other lives. James had a massive hemorrhagic stroke last Tuesday while we were on a week long road trip visiting friends and seeing the fall colors. When we found out, we immediately drove back to Nashville and spent 24 hours in the hospital with James and his wife. The stroke was not survivable and there are now 2 people with kidneys and numerous other lives that will be positively impacted by his organ and tissue donation.

This 24 hour in-hospital experience was do dramatically different from anything I have ever experienced and it gave me hope, The quality of the care was phenomenal, particularly the nursing staff.at TriStar Centennial Medical Center in Nashville. The nurses never seemed to be rushed and were attentive to James, his wife and Craig and I. The support for the process of organ donation was also amazing. James’ wife was presented with a organ donation medallion and will receive a pendant with James finger print. When it came time to take James to the OR for the organ harvest, a special sheet identifying him as an organ donor was placed over him and the hallway to the OR was lined by hospital personnel paying tribute as he was wheeled by. It was all very meaningful for his wife.

Present time – I feel so fortunate that I had the opportunity to see James and Craig make music together 3 times before he died – the last time just 10 days before his stroke. James was only 65 but was a smoker and had already survived on stroke. After the first stroke, he did not have the dexterity for the fingering on his guitar that he was used to so he learned to play the steel guitar. From my perspective he still played his guitar beautifully. Craig is now back to picking up his guitar and playing a few times a week but it is not the same….

I am going to take some lessons on bass guitar so see if I can learn enough to play with Craig on at least a few songs. I write this to hold myself accountable to my commitment. I am not sure I have the ability that Craig feels sure that I have.

After reading my latest blog, Craig said “you forgot Valentines Day”. I assured him I had not forgotten but it deserved its own blog. As VD approached, we were both a bit distracted because my surgery would be on the 15th. We both tend towards spontaneous gestures/gifts rather than “big” ones so we both indicated VD wasn’t a big deal to us, but at the same time it was our FIRST Valentine’s Day.

The Saturday before we were in Franklin KY and a dump truck was parked on the street. Craig said “I always wanted a dump truck”. It stuck. I obviously couldn’t buy a real dump truck but I looked a toy dump trucks on Amazon and spent a lot of time weighing the options. It could be more realistic for fanciful. Then I saw the perfect one. I ordered it and it arrived the day on the 13th.

When I have a gift for someone, I have a hard time waiting until the appointed day to give it and this was not exception. I also am not big on gift wrapping – seems a bit of a waste to my practical side, so I gave Craig the Amazon box and said Happy Valentine’s Day. What man wouldn’t appreciate a lavender and pink dump truck. I had a vision for where it would be placed on his dresser against our lavender walls.

He was appreciative of the gesture and suddenly said he knew what he wanted to give me. He disappeared into his shop and after several hours he came in and said I was not allowed to look out any of the windows. I was preparing food to freeze for my recovery days so it was easy enough to comply.

After dark he came in and wanted me to come outside with him. We walked out into the front yard and I found a swing hanging from a tree. Unbelievably sweet. He said he needed to make a couple of adjustments before I could swing in it. It wasn’t until the morning that I could appreciate how high the branch was that it was attached to.

After he made the adjustments, I had a great time trying it out.

We did good for our first Valentines Day.