Tamara Unleashed

As we were getting to know each other, Craig was clear that he did not cook. I shared that I could cook but because I still had impaired taste and smell I had a limited menu. For myself, it wasn’t worth spending much time preparing what I couldn’t enjoy. Also I told him I ate fish and dairy but I did not eat or cook meat.

By the time we had our first in person meeting on July 16th, we were well acquainted and way beyond a “first date”. I prepared an apple pie, a quiche and some pecan mini pies and off I went.

My food passed the test and as we spent more time together I gradually expanded my repertoire beyond air-fried vegetable medley, pan fried fish and packaged salads. Craig liked a lot of flavor – particularly picked jalapeños in about everything which was fine with me, He was very appreciated of every meal I prepared for him.

I am particularly fond of the ease packaged salads. I add fresh spinach or mixed greens and sometimes other veggies to the what is in the package. I never really paid much attention to what the ingredients actually were as I like pretty much all veggies and Craig seemed fine.with the salads.

About 2 months ago, Craig mentioned that he did not like raw cabbage in green salads. As I never added cabbage I didn’t think that much about it. He mentioned It again a couple of weeks later and I started looking at the packages and realized that most of the packages have cabbage as the main ingredient – OOPS. So I started looking for packages that have no or minimal cabbage (not that many of these exist).

Two weeks ago, Craig indicated that while he likes almost all vegetables, he detests radishes and he was tasting something in the salad that he thought was radishes. So I checked the package label again and while there were no radishes, the last ingredient was radicchio. While radicchio is a type of cabbage and unrelated to a radish, it definitely has a strong and bitter taste that even I can appreciate..

When I was preparing dinner last night I realized the salad mix had radicchio. I was not in a hurry so I plucked it out of the salad. When Craig came in I asked him if he wanted to know how much I loved him after one year.

I told him “an 1/8th of a cup of radicchio.”

While eating things he did not really enjoy, raw cabbage in green salad and radicchio for nearly a year did not harm Craig in any way, I am glad he finally shared his preferences with me.

Just before Memorial Day, Craig took his trailer to Nashville to deliver finished pieces furniture to schools for Nashville Tools for Schools. When they dropped this unstained picnic table off, the principal wanted to know if they would haul away the one they were replacing (below).

Craig thought it would be a great project for me and brought it home. I did a previous blog about the renovation process. I thought the old table had been stained so I wanted to stain it again. When it was done, we took it back to Tools for Schools. The guys were quite impressed with my (our) work. They contacted the school to see if they wanted it back and they did.

I wasn’t able to go with them when it was delivered. The principal was very impressed and wanted to know why this one was so much nicer looking than the new one that had been delivered in May..AWKWARD.

I still have lots to learn. It turns out what we renovated had not been stained. it was just discolored, weathered wood.

Sunday when we finished working on the terrace we had compacted several layers of gravel between the pasture fence and the poles knowing we wanted to add gravel to near the top of the poles. When Monday rolled around we were exhausted and our hands were aching so we thought we would not come back to the terrace until Thursday. as there was no rain predicted until the end of the week. We went to see live music in Nashville Monday night and massages in Nashville on Tuesday. Wednesday was one year from our first communication and we planned a quiet day..

We had planned to take Wednesday off to celebrate and reflect on our relationship’s first year. Around 11 AM Craig checked the weather and saw that a thunderstorm with 2″ of rain was predicted that evening. We did not think the terrace was ready for much rain so we went out and compacted at least 7 more layers of gravel. We finished about a half hour before the rain was predicted. While it is unclear how high the gravel needs to be, we decided it was good enough for the night. Once the rain started we went out to watch the terrace. It was a little hard to know compare to previous rains because the ground on this side of terrace is so distorted from all of the work, but there did not appear to be any flow of water over the terrace. The rain soaked the soil not protected by the trees and eventually pooled enough to start running down hill but it was much less than what I had observed previously. Craig thought he saw some water tracking under the terrace and he ended the evening thinking all of the work may not have helped that much. I couldn’t quite “see” what he was concerned about and was optimistic.

This morning, after confirming we had gotten over 2 inches of rain between 6 PM and midnight with 2 episodes of really hard rain, I cautiously looked at the driveway. To my delight, it was in MUCH better shape than it had been after the 4 previous storms. It seems that all of the work we put into the terrace made a significant difference.

I was not expecting it to make so much of a difference and Craig who is naturally more of a pessimist than I am, is not sure one storm is enough of a test. Time will tell.

I am excited to continue with our terracing work so we can move on to adding top soil and planting grass and flowers to protect it.

Fingers crossed.

My newly discovered enjoyment of gardening (speciifically weeding) came to an abrupt halt with the big downpour on May 26 that washed out the driveway for the 4th time this spring. Our attention turned to starting the terrace project that we had talked about needing to do. We had planned pm expanding our deck and adding a hot tub as our project for early summer because it would be entirely in the shade and the hot tub would be therapy for our sore muscles as we engage in all of our big projects.

My research for what to plant around the house, trees and yard was put on hold as well. It is way more complicated than I thought and until we have the terracing done around the house, plants are premature. My enjoyment of weeding is not diminished. There are a few weeds popping up through the mulch at the base of the trees so I still have an opportunity to go after a few. But, as expected, it is much less enjoyable in the heat and humidity and dry soil than it was in April and May.

One of my favorite days of weeding was on April 26. I was listening to the tbook Remarkably Bright Creatures and blissfully weeding under a tree when I found a metal wire that turned out to be a metal heart. I cleaned it up and Craig hung it at the edge of the deck. It goes perfectly with the “enlightened hillbilly” rustic motif of The Garden. As we were admiring it, we realized it was our 10 month anniversary.

We dog sat for Brady and Carli this weekend and Craig finally got to witness their very unique style of play which started in September of 2022. Their play centers on Carli humping Brady – sometimes doggie and sometimes missionary position and often with Carli’s head or leg in Brady’s mouth. They wrestle a bit in between and sometimes just need a rest break in the fun. it never fails to make me laugh.

A week ago we were still digging post-holes and laying in the first layer of telephone poles and we were just entering the extreme heat wave. Tonight we are looking at the completed 2 layers of telephone poles with 11 posts.

While the heat was challenging, the shade and fans and lots of diluted Gatorade made it possible. The fact that it did not rain at all since we started the project on June 5 made it so much easier because we did not have to pick up all of the tools at the end of each day and bring them out again the next morning.

Last night, after the last pole was laid into place and secured, we both had a big sigh of relief. Later I saw Craig sitting outside reflecting on all that had to go “go right” along the way for us to get this terrace completed. While we still have work to do, the hard part is over. We were working with old telephone poles that Craig had acquired several years ago. The poles were different diameters and lengths and of variable quality. Craig had a plan to complete it with the existing poles but decided on Wednesday that a couple of the poles planned for posts were too deteriorated to have total confidence in so we found some better quality telephone poles about 15 miles away.

End to end alignment of the poles was challenging and this would have not been possible without Katie Kiota to do the heavy lifting.

Tomorrow we will finish adding gravel and compacting it layer by layer until it is level with the top of the poles. The posts will be cut down to be just above the top of the poles. The we have to figure out how much if any filling of the pasture on the other side of the terrace and how to handle the area on the yard side of the terrace. It will take a couple of truck loads of soil to replace all that has been lost to erosion since this house was built 20 years ago. Hopefully with this and the other much less complicated terraces to come, the new soil will be protected.

There were a few challenging communications during this project. I did get better at waiting for instruction rather than moving forward with what seemed like the obvious next step to me. Much of Craig’s frustration was concern for my safety. I do not have much of a sense of fear and may take unnecessary risks especially given he can’t always see things from my angle.

Wednesday June 26 will be one year since Craig and I initiated our text conversation. We are taking the day off to reflect on all that we have shared and experienced on this fabulous journey.

Digging post holes today provided Craig with ample opportunity to reflect back on the many post holes he dug with Grandpa Clarence on his grandpa’s cattle ranch in western Kansas. Craig never really understood what “hubs of Hell meant” and Grandpa Clarence wasn’t inclined to explain. There were plenty of roots and rock to deal with today so the dirt was definitely HARD in places. The other favorite quote was – “what’s YOUR dirt doing in MY hole?”

We got up at 530 AM and were out working around 7 AM. It was already plenty warm and more humid than yesterday. The second layer of logs was moved into place before deciding on location of the post holes. I spent the day filling in gravel around the first layer of logs and tamping it down. For reasons that are not clear, expect perhaps that it sounds more masculine, Grandpa Clarence pronounced tamping as “tomping” I had a bit of tamping experience before today, but now I AM AN EXPERIENCED TAMPER. We have two sizes of tamping sticks. It is truly amazing how many pieces of equipment/tools we have used in this process thus far.

I was finished getting the gravel tamped down around the lower logs by 3 PM. Craig worked another 15 minutes getting one the 4th of 9 post holes to 2 feet depth – aided by a fan if you look closely.

I thought I was keeping up with fluids and electrolytes today but my body did not think so. Tomorrow I will wear my hydration pack. Hopefully we can get the posts in tomorrow – with more tamping of the gravel around the posts.

By the end of the day, Craig was feeling more positive that this plan is going to work. We have watched a lot of YouTube videos about building terraces but could not find any exactly like what we are doing. Fingers crossed.

I am still trying to figure out if Craig’s statement was positive statement or not. He does appreciate my help – mostly. My need to figure out the next step in the process when I don’t understand the process is challenging for Craig at times. When I try to just wait for instructions my mind starts wandering. I don’t really take orders well. Fortunately I did not become a nurse like I originally intended.

After the driveway washed out for the 4th time, we decided we needed to take terraces from the middle of our TO DO list to the top of it. The amount of soil lost across his sloping land this spring is shocking. It is particularly noticeable when mowing – the tree roots that were barely visible last fall are in full view now.

So we are tackling the terrace at the top where much of the water enters the property. Craig had acquired some telephone poles at some point and after doing measuring and taking a telephone pole inventory, he determined we had enough poles for this most important terrace.

The work started a week ago with marking the line for the terrace and establishing a marker line. Katie Kiota helped break up the dirt along the line for the trench.

Then I GOT TO START DIGGING.

I enjoyed the digging. There were less rocks than Craig thought there might be. I am getting better at cutting through massive tree roots but fortunately Craig has a LOT of experience with them. The telephone poles all had to be power washed before they could be cut with chainsaw. The ends were cut at 45 degrees. Craig spent a lot of time trying to figure out which pole to place where along the line. To make it more interesting, the poles are not all the same diameter. They need to be placed in the trench so that the top surface is even and level which means the floor of the trench is different under each pole. Thank goodness we could use Katie to lift and place the poles as they had to go in and out a few times.

After a week, we have the bottom layer of poles in place. They are level.

Tomorrow we dig the holes for the posts to hold the top level of poles in place. We will put rebar spikes through the poles as well to secure them. Once we have the poles in place we will need to build up the ground between the terrace and the pasture.

This part of the property is in the shade in the first half of the day so with the onset of the heat, we are going to try to go to bed early and get up a 5 AM tomorrow.

BTW, a few days ago I realized for the first time in 6 weeks, I didn’t have any spots that were itching. Such a relief to have the poison ivy gone at last. Just in time for bug season. Craig sprayed the yard a couple of times and we put cedar mulch around the deck so hopefully it will not be too bad this year.

Last Saturday after suffering with poison ivy for nearly 3 weeks, I finally felt all of my spots were dry/healed enough that I could use sunscreen without risk of spreading it. So I applied sunscreen and wore a sleeveless shirt out to do some weeding and wood chipping, At some point I noticed the weed whacker and thought I could do a bit a weed whacking ahead of mowing on Sunday. Less than one minute into the whacking, I realized I had previously seen some poison ivy in the area I was working so I stopped but not soon enough.

Fortunately, I was still on the steroids so I tolerated this round much better. Hopefully I have learned my lesson. Craig has gone on a Poison Ivy massacre three times now. Fortunately he is much less sensitive to it than I am.

Last week Craig took his 16 foot trailer into Nashville to help with delivery of several Nashville Tools for Schools projects. While delivering a new picnic table to one school, the principal asked if the old table could be hauled away. Craig recognized that the table was easily salvageable and decided it was a good project for me (really us) to work on.

We disassembled the table and found that there was only one piece of original wood that was too warped to use as a top piece but we were able to cut it up for replacement supports for the table top. We only needed to use one piece of new lumber. I have learned to use a table top planer – a really great piece of equipment to have when working with hard weathered wood. It would have taken forever to sand the wood into a state that could be stained.

Today we will work on sanding and routing the edges before staining. I am not sure what we are going to do with the table once finished. Perhaps the school will want it back or another school would like it.